Random Musings

So... I've finally managed to scrape together the enthusiasm to write a blog post for my oft-neglected blog. Go me! Sometimes I wonder where all the time goes off to *sigh*. It's been four months and I've changed so much. These days, when I look in the mirror I think to myself that I'm old enough to do the whole maturity thing. Then I hear my mum's voice say 'You're old enough to have your own kids, for crying out loud!!'. *shudder* Maybe it's better to remain wilfully ignorant of the big bad world.

Seriously though, I've changed... a lot. I've become a bit more outgoing and have started wearing makeup. There was a time when I wouldn't know one end of an eyeliner from another. Heck, I even willingly had my hair oiled the other day. And, I've discovered that I have a shoe fetish *looks unreasonably pleased with self*. A small one, but a fetish none the less.

Aside from that, there hasn't been any significant change in, say, my schedule *thumbs nose at Eris*. Today, I had the one lecture I can successfully daydream in. Eris, you know what I'm talking about. It was... rather entertaining if I do say so myself. I mean the daydream, not the lecture.

Sometimes I wonder what it would be like to have something named after me. Something really cool like a mathematical formula or a theorem. It would have to be seriously twisted and (potentially) be the cause of a considerable amount of grief for students everywhere. Not something that's debunked in twenty years (J. J. Thompson and his atoms spring to mind).

It's like Pythagoras and Euclid who lived donkey's years ago. Everyone knows about Pythagoras and Euclid. Not that I'd be able to quote Euclid's theorem to you. I mean, I do know it: if someone showed me a copy of said theorem, a little lightbulb at the back of my head would blink and go 'Awwww duuuuuuuude!' (I never said it was a particularly bright lightbulb).

Ofcourse, to even have a snowball's chance in hell of getting there, I'd have to spend a lot more time studying in the library. Not that I don't spend time in the library, because I do. It's just a lot easier to daydream about punching He-Who-Should-Not-Be-Mentioned-But-Who-Frequently-Is, and about *ahem* other figments of my imagination. This ofcourse, leads to smug smirks and sniggering, which in turn leads to my receiving dirty looks and loud shushes from a dweeb at a neighbouring table. At this point, I usually gather up the shreds of my dignity and leave. Honestly, can't even have a giggle in the library anymore. What is the world coming to?

Seriously though, my mind sometime freaks even me out. The other day I was watching the second Matrix movie, and during the rather odd sex scene, all I could think about was whether the sockets on Keanu Reeves' back were of the co-axial cable variety *?*.

Well, now that I've finally finished with this, I'm really craving ice cream. It's not my ice cream, it belongs to a flatmate. But she made the supreme mistake of telling me to 'help myself'. Who am I to look a gift horse in the mouth?

Today I'm grumpy about...

Television shows on bargain hunts and auctions

What is it with the British and bargains? I understand how one can make cool deals at auctions and car boot sales, but is there any need to have T.V. shows on them? And not just one or two... about four a day, one after the other.

Holidays

Europeans are obsessed with holidays. They can never rest till they have atleast one every single year. They won't rest until you do the same as well.

Girls who wear short skirts and stilletos on rainy and cold autumn days

It's so annoying when these Kate Moss wannabees (have I spelt that right?) stand right next to you when you're waiting to cross the road. There's her with her short skirt, teeny blouse and Miss Sixty chunky heels (which are so totally IN, by the way), and then there's you with two layers of clothing, scuffed fuzzy blue boots and Thermawear hat and gloves.

High Street Hairdressers

People regularly spend upto £30 on a simple cut and blowdry. Wanna know how much that is in Rupees? The conversion rate is about Rs 80 for £ 1. You do the math. OR... you could get your hair cut by a trainee for 5 quid. Talk about taking a risk.

D.I.Y.

Do-It-Yourself for those who haven't a clue. Can you imagine wallpapering your own living room? *evil grin* Maybe I should volunteer to do it for Mum.

Being dragged to a pub by my friends

Thus far, I've managed to avoid this eventuality by keeping my bank of excuses varied and up-to-date. Why on earth should I spend money on an entrance fee to watch other people get pissed?

Boob jobs

It's amazing how perfectly well endowed women feel the need to increase their breast size by astronomical proportions. I mean... did you know that there was a bra cup size like FF??? I didn't. It doesn't even make sense. Why would you want to look like you had two zeppelins attached to the front of your rib-cage?

Waxing and Plucking of eyebrows

All I can say is 'Ouch'.

People who don't comment on one's blog when one has made one hell of an effort to post something in the first place

It can't be THAT hard. The hyperlink is just down there. Stop sniggering Eris.

12 Things I Love About The Monsoon

1) Seeing the sky turn amber right before the first rains of the season.

2) Sitting in the balcony with a hot cup of really strong tea and the wind blowing the rain and gardenia petals in my face ( and hair on the occasions when I actually let it grow past my ears.).

3) Going for long walks in the rain with Nut and Bubble and laughing so hard we can barely stand for increasingly inane reasons.

4) Going for swims when it’s raining heavily and having the pool to myself because no one else is stupid enough to try including Nut and Bubble who quote love me very much but friendship only goes so far end quote.

5) Bunking college and going to the beach to have golas and chase the soap bubble guy.

6) Hanging out of the speeding train till the sting of the drops becomes too much and my face freezes and burns at the same time.

7) Being soaking wet and unable to resist the smell of the piping hot samosas at the station and then worrying about whether or not we’re going to die of some horrible disease.

8) Having school/college cancelled due to heavy rains.

9) Not having to water my plants.

10) Standing on the terrace and getting soaked and absolutely loving life and wondering at how close the lightening seems and then realizing that maybe I shouldn’t be leaning against the lightening rod.

11) Watching the pretty red stream of water running out the front gate and down the street and wondering what my aunt will say when she realizes that the red mud she just had trucked over for her garden is now clogging the gutters.

12) Having my mother wake me up in the middle of the night when there’s a storm so I can sit all night and watch the lightening.

Wanted: A Life

Finally!! I'm free. No more exams... for now. I can stop worrying till the results get home. Now I can just sit back and do whatever the bleeding hell I want. Which is easier said than done, ofcourse. There's only so many hours that one person can sleep through at a stretch (15 in my case). To top things off, I have a cold. A bad cold. Complete with a sore throat. Eris was kind enough to present me with her sympathy, and some fan fiction hyperlinks. Speaking of which, can you please send me more, Eris? Pretty please? Pretty please on a Ducati with a leather jacket on top? I've finished with the one you sent me.

The summer holidays are... different from the rest of the year. Well, that much is obvious, but I mean a different kind of different. You can feel it in your bones. The air even smells different (that could just be the cold). It's all sultry and warm and lazy, with the occasional drizzle and chilly breeze. Not to mention three months of completely free time.

What on earth am I going to do with myself?

I could try getting a job, I suppose. Could do with the cash. I mean, I'm not a complete lout. I did try get a job last summer as well. It isn't my fault if they called me after I left for university. But I can't possibly work 24/7. It's not humane. I need time for leisure. What do I do then?

The funny thing about being at university for 8 months out of 12, is that you completely lose interest in television. Heck, I don't even care about the Saturday night movie premieres anymore. It's strange how your perception changes over time. And I can't really go to the pub down the road... not unless I have a death wish. Which I don't.

I can always fall back on my trusty books, though. Right now, I'm reading Jane Austen's 'Pride and Prejudice'. It's wonderful. I don't know how I never got around to reading it sooner. Right now, I've reached the bit where everyone (Miss Bennet, rather) finds out that Mr. Darcy isn't as big a git as they think he is. And I suppose Eris could be persuaded to keep me well sated with a steady supply of fan fiction.

Now all I have to do is pack my stuff to go home (amazing, how much junk I've collected), actually go home, practice playing the piano, do the dishes without being told to and basically, not set fire to the house. Oh, and try and post stuff on my blog more often. And now I have officially reached the end of this post *punches fist in air, does the happy dance and stubs toe on bedpost*. Ack! I need to get a life!

Ten Things That I've Failed To Understand

1. Eris' obsession with goose berries and the like.
2. Eris.
3. French, Marathi, Hindi... basically any language besides English.
4. The outcry over 'Baa-Baa Black sheep' (it's racist apparently). The powers-that-be have proposed to rename it 'Baa-Baa Rainbow sheep'. I'm not sure how much water this particular idea holds. Would the word 'Rainbow' refer to spray-painted/graffitied sheep, perchance? (I've just heard that it refers to people of all colours... whatever that means.)
5. The 'Neighbours' society.
6. The point of frying asparagus... and consequently setting off the fire alarms. And I wasn't the one who did it.
7. Using straightening irons to straighten straight hair.
8. Writing a philosophy essay over two bottles of wine. Sez and Pange tried this once. They even managed to contradict both Plato and God in one sentence (stroke of brilliance, really). Unfortunately, they woke up the next morning with splitting headaches, and couldn't remember what it was.
9. Plato's theory of the realm of the forms. Something to do with every object/idea having a perfect form in an abstract realm of perfect forms. My conclusion... Plato had no life.
10. Kilts. Isn't it rather cold and windy in Scotland?

Right. So, its summer again. Joy.
You know what? Other people in other countries have the sense to ease into the whole heat thing. First you have a pleasant, invigorating spring that heralds the warm summer months full of people enjoying days in the park and at the beach and blah. Just blah.
Over here, we don’t have any truck with the whole easing into it bit. Oh no! We jump from a cold winter ( cold enough to make early morning lectures hell to get to but not cold enough for me to enjoy snow) straight into barbecue night in hell (a.k.a summer in Bombay). Ugh. In case you’re reeeeeeeeeeeaaallly slow, I HATE SUMMER!
Ugh! Its hot, its humid, my hair curls even more than usual and the pool gets infested with annoying little brats who do nothing but splash and make a racket and seem to be laboring under the delusion that pool = toilet.
And as Leilani was kind enough to remind me, the weather is annoyingly fine in Wales.
Sigh. I love winter. Why can’t it be winter all year round?
If you try to tell me that we must have summer to better appreciate the winter, I will be forced to hurt you. Well anyway…..
Have yourselves a wonderful time, regardless of the weather whilst I drive everyone around me to commit ritualistic suicide by my incessant whining.

The Art of Exaggeration

I've only ever seen snow twice. So I suppose you can understand my enthusiasm on listening to radio reports expecting snowfall all over the UK. "I can't believe it's actually snowing everywhere in the country" said Claire on 'Flirty at 10:30'. I did see the snow this morning. As a matter of fact, I counted a grand total of 10 snowflakes. Yes... I counted. The rest of it was rain. It was an anti-climax, to say the least.

Having nothing better to do with my time, I started to wonder. Are all weather reports slightly exaggerated? Is it only the weather reports? Why is it that when I look for examples of exaggeration, I can't find them? Could this have anything to do with Murphy's Law? I did a Google search on 'exaggeration'. All I wanted to do was check and see if I got the spelling right. I love Google. Not only did it check my spelling for me, it threw up a definition and a bunch of quotes as well. Here are some of my favourites.

There are people so addicted to exaggeration, they can't tell the truth without lying. -Josh Billings.

Man is inclined to exaggerate almost everything- except his own mistakes. -Author Unknown.

Nothing makes a fish bigger than almost being caught. -Author Unknown.

(You can find these quotes and more like them at www.quotegarden.com. I included them in this post, because I needed to practise referencing... sort of.)

I wonder if life is less interesting without exaggeration. I'd have to conclude that it is. Anyone who's read Jerome K. Jerome's 'Three Men In A Boat' might agree with me. No... wait... they should agree with me.

Now I shall wind this piece up and spare you further confusion from this current bout of randomness. Not that this is very confusing. It's just exaggeration, you know.