Ten Things That I've Failed To Understand

1. Eris' obsession with goose berries and the like.
2. Eris.
3. French, Marathi, Hindi... basically any language besides English.
4. The outcry over 'Baa-Baa Black sheep' (it's racist apparently). The powers-that-be have proposed to rename it 'Baa-Baa Rainbow sheep'. I'm not sure how much water this particular idea holds. Would the word 'Rainbow' refer to spray-painted/graffitied sheep, perchance? (I've just heard that it refers to people of all colours... whatever that means.)
5. The 'Neighbours' society.
6. The point of frying asparagus... and consequently setting off the fire alarms. And I wasn't the one who did it.
7. Using straightening irons to straighten straight hair.
8. Writing a philosophy essay over two bottles of wine. Sez and Pange tried this once. They even managed to contradict both Plato and God in one sentence (stroke of brilliance, really). Unfortunately, they woke up the next morning with splitting headaches, and couldn't remember what it was.
9. Plato's theory of the realm of the forms. Something to do with every object/idea having a perfect form in an abstract realm of perfect forms. My conclusion... Plato had no life.
10. Kilts. Isn't it rather cold and windy in Scotland?